Monday, March 21, 2011

Battle: Los Angeles - Laying Waste To A Promising Premise

If you were to take Armageddon, Independence Day, District 9, Saving Private Ryan and G.I. Jane and stick 'em in a centrifuge, Battle: Los Angeles is what you might find at the bottom of the test tube; A thick, dense mess that contains bits and pieces of the afore-mentioned films (their worst elements) and nothing else.  Beyond the premise twist - An alien invasion from the ground-level you-are-there, war is hell marine perspective - Battle offers nothing original in the way of character, plot or even special effects. I would guess that the studio pitch offered a District 9/Hurt Locker mash-up, but while those films offered compelling well-written scripts, here we're given the same ol' same ol'.


The first 10 minutes of the film offers the expositional prowess of Armageddon-  a grave side soliloquy, a retiring marine called back for "one last mission",  an untested marine lieutenant in over his head,  and the baby-faced virgin green marine fresh from basic.  There are so many cliches in fact, that I'll stop here. I have nothing against a well-turned cliche, updated, refreshed, satirical and properly used,  but Battle: Los Angeles is about as fresh as fetid alien dung.  And worse, it's just plain lazy.


Christopher Bertolini gets a solo screenplay credit, yet B: L A feels like it was raped and pillaged by a carnivorous team of development execs that had to get their grubby little paws all over what might have been an interesting foundation. I tend to bend backward and make excuses for the under-appreciated screenwriter.  Studios with dollar signs in their eyes can grind a writer into bloody pulp in an attempt to drain any trace of originality from a script, so I suppose it should come as no surprise that there isn't even an ounce of originality to be found here. But even if Bertolini was developed into the ground by studio minions, he still must bear some responsibility. I'm sure he couldn't give a shit about my thoughts, he's already cashed that fat 7 figure paycheck. And he shouldn't care what I think. 


Movie making IS a business as Melissa Leo pointed out in her Oscar acceptance speech. But with last year's 100 million plus bonanza for quality films like Black Swan (budget: 13 million) The King's Speech ( budget: 15 million) and True Grit (budget: 38 million) - all scripts where the writer's contribution was immense and respected - maybe the need to beat a script into submission based on a presumption of knowing what audiences want, will take a back seat next year at this time,  and a film such as Battle: Los Angeles, with an exciting premise might be fully realized.